Author Archives: T. Resnikoff

Hello Family,
In the month of June we will celebrate Fathers Day and the beginning of Summer.  June is also a month in which cities across the world will host Gay Pride events.  After many years of not attending Pride events, I decided to show my Pride and celebrate with Milwaukee’s LGBT community last weekend.  After walking around the grounds and visiting most of the booths and food venders, I settled in at the LGBT Center of Southeast WI booth, where I socialized and talked about present and future programming at the Center.  As darkness fell, people begin to gather in the main stage area for the final concert and headline performer LeAnn Rimes.
Okay, I will admit to having a love/unlike relationship with Country Music which stems in part from the less than accepting history of the genre toward the LGBT community and people of color.  So, I was undecided as to whether or not I would attend the concert.  Just as I decided to head home, the music started and I found myself swaying to the beat, singing along and moving closer to the stage.  LeAnn was phenomenal in her performance, sharing about how her life influences her music and the lessons she has learned the past year.
One lesson she learned is the power of forgiving and asking for forgiveness.  From personal experience, I know it is harder to ask for forgiveness than it is to forgive.  What I have learned from my years in recovery is that it is even harder for me to forgive myself which is where I need to begin if I want to change how I treat myself and others.
Over the next month, I want you to ponder the following questions.  When was the last time you forgave yourself?  Is there someone who you need to ask for forgiveness?  Is there someone who you need to forgive?
As always, I would love to hear from you.  You can message me on Facebook at Monica Cummings, email me at mcummings@uua.org or leave a comment for me on the YaYA of Color blog, UU Living Mosaic at http://uuyayaoc.blogs.uua.org/.
Living My Faith,
Rev. Monica

Hi Family,
I go through periods of time when I stop watching or reading the news to protect my mental health.  Part of last week was one of those times.  It felt like my head was going to spin off with the constant coverage of the Royal Wedding, people questioning President Obama’s place of birth and the upcoming trial of Casey Anthony.  Just when I though it was safe to watch the news again, Osama bin Laden was killed.  At first, I was amazed at the spontaneous celebrations and puzzled at the number of people who wanted OBL’s death photos released.  I dismissed the celebrations as people exhaling after almost 10 years of waiting for the next attack by OBL and his followers on U.S. soil.  I equated people’s curiosity to see the photos with our inability to look away at a car accident as we drive past.  Then, as the days passed, I began to wonder if we as a nation were not becoming what we despise in others.  For example, I recalled the name calling and demonization of those in other lands who cheered after 9/11 and other events when U.S. citizens or soldiers were killed.
Holding all the above in my heart and mind, I started thinking about our first UU Principle which calls us to “Affirm and Promote the Inherent Worth and Dignity of every person” and I will add dead or alive.  So I ask you, what does the first UU Principle mean to you?  How do you apply it to your life?  Do you have conditions as to who qualifies?  Does the first principle apply to a person who is considered evil?
I would love to hear from you.  You can message me on Facebook at Monica Cummings, email me at mcummings@uua.org or leave a comment for me on the YaYA of Color blog, UU Living Mosaic at http://uuyayaoc.blogs.uua.org/.
Living My Faith,
Rev. Monica

Hi Family,
Last August the Youth and Young Adult Ministries Office sponsored the first annual Multicultural Leadership School (MLS) for Youth and Young Adults of Color.  The second annual MLS will be held in Boston, August 5-9, 2011.  The MLS is open to all UUs who identify as a person of color ((Native American, Asian, Arab, Latino/a, African descent, trans-racially adopted, bi-racial and multiracial) and are 15-30 years old.  Please share the following information about the MLS with your congregation, youth group, RE class, minister, DRE, district Youth Steering Committee, friends and family.
The Unitarian Universalist Association like the United States has a growing number of people of color.  As this trend continues, UU congregations, districts and continental committees will need youth and young adults of color to take on leadership.  However, there are challenges when a member of a minority group who is often marginalized takes on leadership responsibilities.  Examples of challenges are tokenism, racism, and a high rate of burn-out due to over-commitment and a lack of preparation for leadership.   Therefore, the Multicultural Leadership School will focus on leadership development for youth and young adults of color that will prepare them to lead the way in supporting a multicultural, anti-racist, anti-oppressive Unitarian Universalist faith community.
The (MLS) is a training designed specifically for UU Youth and Young Adults (age 15-30) of Color.  The goal of the training is to equip participants to be leaders in their UU congregation, district or continental committee. The three and a half day school will feature experienced facilitators who will be intentional in providing participants with experiences that will foster relationship building, leadership skills, racial/ethnic identity development, inter-cultural collaboration and deepening of faith identity. At the conclusion of the training, participants will have a new community of peers, stronger and more confident leadership abilities and a stable foundation for sustainable leadership in Unitarian Universalist congregations and other Unitarian Universalist communities and organizations.
Applications are due May 15, 2011.  Please apply at
http://www.uua.org/religiouseducation/youth/identity-based/color/158494.shtml
As always, I would love to hear from you.  You can message me on Facebook at Monica Cummings, email me at mcummings@uua.org or leave a comment for me on the YaYA of Color blog, UU Living Mosaic at http://uuyayaoc.blogs.uua.org/.
Living My Faith,
Rev. Monica

Dear Family,
It seems a lifetime ago since I wrote my February newsletter column.  In the past 30 days people in North Africa wanting freedom, political choice and economic opportunities have peacefully revolted and forced oppressive political leaders out of power.  As I write this column, I am watching Al Jazeera English and the unfolding rebellion in Libya.  And in my home state of Wisconsin, public employees and their allies have been protesting against legislation that would weaken union membership and their power.
The change that is happening in this country and other parts of the world is scary and can tap into the deepest part of our fears.  I was once told that the only thing in life I can count on is change.  I find that on some days I embrace change with open hands and heart.  While on other days, I fear change and resist it with the all the energy I have.  How do you deal with change?  What goes through your mind when you realize change is in your life?  How much do you fear change?
I think the following poem by Sara Moores Campbell will be helpful during the changing and fearful times we live in.
Love Casts Out Fear
In fear we isolate ourselves.
In love, we connect with others.
In fear, we become immobilized.
In love, we are empowered to act.
In fear, we judge others.
In love, we seek justice.
In fear, we distrust.
In love, we trust.
In fear, we seek punishment.
In love, we seek mercy and forgiveness.
In fear, we see death.
In love, we see life.
In fear, we retreat.
In love, we reach out.
Let us reach out in love and support one another through change and fear.
As always I would love to hear from you.  You can message me on Facebook at Monica Cummings, email me at mcummings@uua.org or leave a comment for me on the YaYA of Color blog, UU Living Mosaic at http://uuyayaoc.blogs.uua.org/.
Living My Faith,
Rev. Monica

Hi Family,
Happy New Year!  I took time during the Holiday season to drive from Wisconsin to Central Texas to spend time with members of my family.  When I told people I was going to drive instead of fly, the most common response I heard was, “do you think it is safe to drive that far this time of year?”  I assured them that I would follow regional weather reports and cut my trip short if necessary.  As it turned out, I left Texas a day early to avoid projected bad weather.  When I arrived at home and pulled into my driveway, I said a silent prayer of thanks for my safe travels.
Two days later en route to the YMCA, my car stalled and the engine light came on.  I found myself getting angry and then the following question crossed my mind.  “What would have happened if the car stalled and the engine light came on during my multi-state road trip?”  That simple question shifted my attitude from anger to gratitude because I was only four blocks instead of four hundred miles from home.
How often do we think about what we do not have instead of what we have?  How many times a day does our thoughts focus on what’s lacking in our lives as opposed to the abundance that surrounds us?  How different would life be if an attitude of gratitude was cultivated and we were mindful to say thank you to others, our selves and to life?  As we settle into a new year, consider cultivating an attitude of gratitude.  I encourage you to be alert to thanking others for the significant and mundane things done for you each day.
As for my car, there was a crack in the ignition coil and it and the spark plugs needed to be replaced.  Following my own advice, I thanked the service techs, grateful that I had the resources to pay for the repairs.
I would love to hear from you.  You can message me on Facebook at Monica Cummings, email me at mcummings@uua.org or leave a comment for me on the YaYA of Color blog, UU Living Mosaic at http://uuyayaoc.blogs.uua.org/.
Living My Faith,
Rev. Monica

Hello Family,
Happy Holidays!  In the month of December, Hanukkah, Winter Solstice, Christmas and Kwanzaa will be celebrated.  However you experience the holiday season, I wish you serenity and safety in the last month of 2010.
During this final month of the year, I encourage you to make a special effort to reflect on the past year and note whether or not you achieved the goals you set, what challenges you overcame and the relationships you maintained. Then ask yourself, “What do I want to achieve in 2011?” Is there something you wanted to do this year and delayed doing? Are there things you did this year that you want to leave in the past?  Are there relationships you want to nurture or let go of in the coming the year?  I encourage you to begin creating the tomorrow (or 2010) you want to have, today.
Finally, I invite you to reach out to family and friends who may be struggling with illness, unemployment or depression during this holiday season, when the social and cultural expectation is for people to be happy.  Conversely, if you are suffering with depression, please reach out for support.  Youth and Young Adults of Color who are interested, I have a list of UU ministers and religious professionals of color who are willing to provide chaplain support during the holidays.  Please contact me for a list of their names.
You can message me on Facebook at Monica Cummings, email me at mcummings@uua.org or leave a comment for me on the YaYA of Color blog, UU Living Mosaic at http://uuyayaoc.blogs.uua.org/.
Living My Faith,
Rev. Monica

Hi Family,

I write this column with a broken heart.  My heart is broken because of the number of young people who have attempted or successfully committed suicide over the past month. My heart is broken because once again cries for help were ignored until a critical mass of suicides forced the media, politicians, clergy and other adult authority figures to pay attention.
I just reread the Executive Summary of the 2009 Gay, Lesbian Straight Education Network (GLSEN) report, Shared Differences: The Experiences of Lesbian, Gay, Bi-sexual and Transgender Students of Color in Our Nations Schools.  The findings of the report confirm what the national media is finally reporting; many GBLT students do not experience public schools as being safe spaces for them if their sexual orientation, gender expression or gender identity deviates from what has been defined as the norm.  As we have learned over the last month bullying is at an all time high, and going to school for many GBLT youth is hazardous for their health.  Many people are focused on the bullies who have created hell on earth for GBLT youth. What about the silent witnesses who are on the school buses, walking the hallways and sitting in classrooms?  What is their responsibility?
What GBLT youth and young adults need are allies.  People who will support them when they are called disrespectful names, threatened with violence and made to feel other than who they are; human beings who deserve to be treated with love and respect.  To quote Audre Lorde, “Your silence will not protect you,” because racism, classism, sexism, ableism, ageism, and heterosexism are all linked.  Until we each speak-up for someone being mistreated, bullies and bigots will continue to interpret our silence as acceptance.  If you want to be an ally, join or start a Gay Straight Alliance group at your school, tell the bully to leave your friend alone, or report abusive behavior to a responsible adult.  Finally, you can ask the person being mistreated how you can be supportive.
As always I would love to hear from you.  You can message me on Facebook at Monica Cummings, email me at mcummings@uua.org or leave a comment for me on the YaYA of Color blog, UU Living Mosaic at http://uuyayaoc.blogs.uua.org/.
Living My Faith,
Rev. Monica